Internet went that slow that I had to call and complain after an hour of technical troubleshooting. After about 10 hours of wait, finally it's back to normal!
Day 6 and 7 were pretty much the same. Home, spending time with Kat and Sean. How I envy the PDA, making my days even slower before I get to see Uber. The couple decided to cook. I was really sleepy while waiting but managed to crawl out of bed to spend the very little time left with Kat. Laksa with pasta replacing the traditional noodles. Not bad at all. Sean whipped up custard, jello and added peaches. Along with carnation milk, it was sinful yet fulfilling!
Day 8, I woke up feeling wrong. Said some things I should not, and felt I was really silly and all in all, abnormal? My insecurities has never failed to leave me after all these years. It sometimes punches me in the face. I start to wonder if I am suffering from periodical depressions. Guess being independent overseas is not that fitting for me after all. One of those signs that keeps reminding me to head back. Then again, I am such a thinker, place no matter. He has been so patient with me which makes me feel bad at times. After all, he did nothing to deserve my uncalled for sad blabbering. His constant assurance fills my world up. His thoughts, questions, words just hit my heart and mind. His understanding and flowing of how I feel is scary at times. Is he my soul-mate? Love is a choice... a chance given, a space given... Am I being too serious or just not confident? Scared to be hurt or lose that someone again? Thinking too far of what I want vs what will happen? Pinning on too much hopes vs another dream not true? What come may...
Came back from work and slept after 20 hours of activities. Woke up to receive Uber's shaver and went on to the supermarket. Cooked chicken curry and my friends came over. Had a few hours of laughter. Of course, questions of, when you leaving, what you going to do, have you found a job, were common. Lost is how I feel. Not to worry is the echo. My pillar, his voice. Kat is back from work too. Day 9's menu planned, chicken curry for me to play with again and Mr Sean's custard and jello!
Yay, MR episode 27 done, 28, am going to finish this episode and hopefully fall asleep. I am tired yet my mind seems to be running worlds. With that pain attacking on and off, hoping the walls of my stomach is still healthy enough to last.
Leaning towards falling into those arms again... missing those times...
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