Hate Love

Our lives are shaped by those who love us and by those who refuse to love us. Love that we cannot have is the one that lasts the longest, hurts the deepest and feels the strongest.

You tried to block the memory of one to protect self from pain. No matter how, you are just insignificant. What more can you do but let go knowing hurt will be invited anyway. The seeking of simple love becomes so worn out, it eats one up. Thought there is someone who really cared But it seems that one don't know how.

You hate love after many tries. You build up this whole armor, for years, so nothing can hurt you, then one person, no different from any other person, wanders into your stupid life.You give them a piece of you. They do something dumb one day like kiss you, or smile at you. Then your life isn't your own anymore.

Love takes hostages. It eats you up slowly. It leaves you crying in the darkness, so a simple phrase like, 'maybe we should just be friends' or 'how very perceptive' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a body-hurt,It's a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain.

The feeling came creeping through and the hurt is still the same. The pain will ease in time and though it's over, the memories at one corner. Will you then try to love again? It ain't love that hurts, it is the absence of it that does. If you cry because the sun has set in your life, your tears will prevent you from seeing the stars. So if you continue to let hurt set in your life, your wounds will prevent you from seeing true love. Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.

To hate or to love... to be hurt or to be love and to love... we all ride on the waves in love. There is true love for everyone. Just in time, not your time... but in time of love, love will set and complete everyone who has faith in it.

DiminishinG

Sounds and sights, our daily fellowship.
Time and tide, awaiting no one.
Family and friends, that kinship.
Who will be there to be the one?

Diminishing is the directions.
Diminishing is the humanity.
Diminishing is the human touch.
Diminishing is the human hearts.

The path is narrowing,
with much to be swallowed.
The time is clicking,
with much to be completed.

Diminishing... small, tiny to microscopic.
Something to nothing and nothing at all.

Remove, Reinstall, Install

Miss Bibi has not been diligently updating her blog. What has been happening to her? Too much, too many... As she clicked on today's time, she saw in a month down the road, she will turn 30. OMG!!!

Ever since her return to home, she has been through a series of events. Not very "wootzful" but somehow, she got herself there, allowed it further. She finally takes charge and gladly have herself back for recognition. Slowly but surely, things are going to fall in place. Just a matter of time.

Her current challenge is to kick a bad habit of hers for good. Her current heart - beating - along with someone. Her current worries, main - work - which hopefully will clear up real soon. Her current Her - not too healthy - will try gear away n up. Her current feel on social life - time for a change - hunting down places to chill and gather. All in all - CHANGES to be installed. A need to remove, reinstall or install for a better 30 forth.

Not looking forward to the big 30 somehow, however, yearning to welcome certain events in later life........ hoping......

Oh No...

When it goes on and on,

We wonder what has been going on.

When it stops and hits,

We wonder what has been stopping the hits.

Oh No...

Here we go again with something to gain?

What is it this time that will be gained?

Here we go running a distance in pain?

What is it that can sustain the pain?

Oh No...

There is plenty and plenty,

Which is then the one in the plenty?

There are many and many,

Who is then the uniquely in the many?

Oh No...

Helpless

H - Hibernation
E - Exhaustion
L - Lost
P - Powerless
L - Lacking
E - Edgy
S - Sickening
S - Shameful

T.A.S.K. - just for thoughts

The world is ever changing.
We have to change to move on.
We use not what we used to.
We present not what we were taught with.

Technology, we use it daily for almost anything, not before.
Activities, we dig for new ideas, out of the extraordinary than before.
Systems, we tap on resources, not individual farming like before.
Knowledge, we gather continuously, not just books like before.

Basic requirements for survival in today's society changed.
Are we analysing the changes and adopting?
How does a personal touch sound to us now? An email? A SMS?
Time effectiveness, are we wasting on the disqualified?
Competitive advantages, how far a difference are we from so many?
Learning curve, are we learning to learn, unlearn and relearn?

C-Zone

How many of us like to be in a controlled zone, more commonly know as comfort zone?

Being in order, having things right, letting events be in the correct zone.

Very often we all pin hopes when in comfort zone.

With ease, everything operates within that safe zone.

Take things for granted and fall then into unknown zone.

Is there amber or red lights for warning before danger zone?

Acknowledge or ignore and drop to tuning zone.

Adjustment and adaptability frame the zone.

What's next that will take place in that zone?

C-zone. A cycle.

It happens. It is unique to us all.

A zone we choose to stay or go.

What is your preferred zone?

Lala Times

Have you taken a break - I meant by months? I just did for a month and I am already feeling so good - not. First time ever, to try not to hop on to another job after one resignation. Yes, in bad times still. How daring yeah? Coupled with the fact that I have no drive for the next job I want to be in.

Two ways ahead, to go back to what I did or to move to something which is going to create a whole new chaotic world of mine. Decision making used to be so easy for me. Dare to dream, plan to execute, get the job and be on it! Without a dream, my path stalled. My path ahead fogged up.

Many doors are open but the fact that I have no dreams, no dare. The plans to execute are not there and to be on a job - I dare dream - not - which!

Lala times are filled with activities for my brain and emotions. I get tired at times, don't know why, I got drained.

Good news of others make me smile. Tying the knots and sharing lives in future... how sweet. Bouncing the question back to me - dare not even dream.

Lala times are going to be over soon. I need to gear up and move towards a whole new world... will I make it? I don't know. At least I can give it a try, put in my best before I am sentenced the compatibility to my capability.

Slowing Down

When you keep pacing and racing for no reason,
When you keep wondering about the season.
When you lose the momentum,
When you lose the stamina to drum.
Is it time?

Slowing down for some reason or the other,
Slowing down for some changes to do better.
Slowing down to feel the real,
Slowing down to make the deal.
It is time.

It does not matter,
Till all is sober.
Slowing down, you never know...
What treasures comes with Slow.
Is it time for you to be slowing down?

Thank you '08, Hello '09!

Walking through 2008 was real quick, 2009 is here!
In less than a few months, my life has been overwhelmed with changes and series of the unexpected. However, I am still thankful for all that has happened in 2008. Lessons learnt, experiences multiplied and moments treasured. I heart my true friends who have been by my side, no matter where, when and how. Thank those people who made a part of life more meaningful.

Towards the end of 2008 marked my farewell to Dubai. A place I love and hate. I am already missing the people in Dubai who went through the past 3 years or so with me. That "gang", my peeps, will hardly be disbanded no matter where we are. That bond is something very special and miraculous. Heart-warming friendship that will forever keep in shape.
My journey started in Singapore again. This time, with many hurdles I hardly know how to handle. Letting things take its own course may do me good as I was so stressed in getting life in order. The unexpected did happen. The "never" happened as well. It was a long journey to finally discover, relate and define. There seems to be a direction that is common. However, only time can tell. Nothing is for sure, nothing is impossible. The key to behold comes from how much you want it and feel for it.

"True love never fails..."

2009 - What will it be like? Where will it lead to? Will walking through 2009 be happier and more meaningful? Will it mark more colorful and precious moments?
Let there be more moments to treasure...