Tata'07, Arlow'08

The remains of my 2007 was spent with good home food and many of my great party mates, as well as family and close friends. Many things have changed for sure. My first December back home after 2 years being away.

I am happy that many of my friends have moved on to another stage in life, talking about the attached, married and those with kids. However, that makes me less occupied, more lonely? Others, not heard, not seen, wonder what is happening to these people. Well, guess I did move on to another stage in life but in a very different way.
My 2007 was filled with many events. From health, relationships, family matters and work. Financially, things did not get any better. I heart those who make memories of my 2007, thank you! There are events that made me think I was stupid. However, lessons of 2007 marked another level of my life.

2008, many goals to accomplish. First of all, to really save for my return back home, as my future seems unstable for 2008. Next is to make changes to my lifestyle, which does not seem to get any better over the years. Lastly, to build up the relationships that seem very distant from home. Wishing that in 2008, a better job will come along. Ideal will be one that includes travelling. I am hoping to be back home for good in the third quarter of 2008. Wishing that there will be more LOVE too, not just for me but the world!

So many to reflect on, so much to hope for.

Family and friends, thank you all for making my 2007 and here's to all, HAPPY 2008! With lots of love... wherever you guys may be.

Johannesburg

As I drift in and out of places, each place leave a set of memories.
Some pretty normal compared to those which are beyond description and boundaries.

Just had a two day stay in Johannesburg, South Africa. Was at Indaba Hotel, more of a resort-like place. With huts that holds rooms, surrounded with trees and wonders of nature. No pictures due to the rainy weather. Did not want to catch the gloomy side of South Africa. Come to think of it, I have been there a couple of times, each time, it rains or there was no one to take on adventures of Safari and the Lion's Park with me! ARghhhhhh! What waste!

People who work there are such sweethearts. The smiles, greetings and gestures of simplicity touch the inner side of me. It just hit me so hard as I compare to the urban whacked humans. I went to a spa within the hotel just to spend time away with the lazing weather. It was a open hut concept, very African style. The lady boss who took me around, is such a gem. Her welcoming warmth was not a fake. As she talked about her employees, many of them are single-parent ladies, who needs a job to survive. She said her concept was to provide such ladies with a place they can feel belonged to. My therapist, Agnes, who did my body massage is a young girl, 20. Her smile was of such beauty. I did a hot stone full body massage, inclusive the use of essential oil, within a small open hut and African music as background. Amazing experience! I will not say it was very professional, however, relaxing enough with the nature around.

A very relaxed trip, spent time sleeping and resting. Not forgetting the different species of birds chirping on the trees every now and then. Johannesburg next time to be a more adventurous one!

Sigh...My back has not recovered, hopefully I will be able to seek treatment somewhere, sometime... in order to be myself once again - I miss hyper Bibi!

So much going on!!!

Guess the last update I had on blog was way too outdated! Seriously, too many things been happening around me. That many I have forgotten where to start. Shall I just dropped them?

Let me give a summary of my health status because many out there are wondering why I am missing from actions! I miss the gang I hang out with here. But till I get better, I then can make a good comeback!
Since August been down with flu on and off till NOW! Can you believe that?!? I wonder if I am weak or it's just the environment I am in. The ever changing weather plays a part too? *shrugs* Besides that, my old injury on my back has been giving me some problems. It is getting unbearable. Ya, I know I am stubborn but at first I thought it could be just aches from overwork or strains. I thought it was body ache from the flu. Now I am suffering from it. It is irritating though as I cannot function proper. My routines been interrupted for a month due to that! Oh no, fats deposit again! EEEKS! For now, my concern is, if it is going to deteriorate or get better.

Friends here seem all busy and away for leave at different timings. So, gradually, dispersal of the party goers! Friends back home seem so busy and caught up with things. Friends somewhere else around the globe seem to be having some great changes in life! Wherever they are, I just hope they are happy with what's going on for them in life!

Talking about friends, I recently realised we all have different views on friendship. An old mate of mine quoted, "Friends come and go....", that's his view. I agree to some extent. However, true friends stay no matter what. True friends do not judge what you do or not do. True friends are like pillars you can lean on. I can go on and on. I guess we all know how to identify these friends. They may not necessary be the ones you see often or meet often. *sighz* I miss so many of them. Sometimes I just feel so bad not been able to catch up with them. Timing and lifestyles are different. Looking at it, I guess I am one of those very few left to move on to another stage of life. Don't think that will happen for me...

Was talking to another mate who shares the same job. Only we understand how lonely we can get as we stagger around the world. Cheers to Y.C! Nothing beats travelling with someone close. Besides, it is the moments shared that makes the best memories. It is so difficult to explain, many envious onlookers, but only if you are in it, you will truly understand, it is just not the painted pictures!

So much going on, so little I can do.....

Sydney

Sydney Harbour Bridge and Opera House

City life has always been familiar. Back home the busy streets, people and traffic. Somehow missed that part in my life now. However, too much of it kills, doesn't it?
Was in Sydney for a couple of days. Accommodation was along Philips Street, buzzing with shopping and offices, locals and tourists. Weather was rainy. I was lucky to catch some shine on one of those days with soothing breeze of Sydney.
Started the day before noon. Did some window shopping and roaming on George Street before lunch in an Italian cafe! A need for a beer to kick off!

At the Italian Cafe

Thereafter, Yoo Keung and I started our trip to Opera House. We were just walking and enjoying the beautiful weather! A few snaps here and there. We happened to get into the Botanic Gardens too, just around the corner of Opera House!

On steps @ frontal of Opera House

Botanic Gardens

We got ourselves some sushi and stuff from the supermarket. Shopping for clothes was not very successful. Went back with food instead. However, we thoroughly enjoyed the wonderful weather. Kamsa Hamida, YK, for the laughters and moments shared. More to come hopefully!

Happy looking forward!

Was trying to sleep more. Guess the worries are more. Not in the best physically to perform duties I suppose. However, I need to cover back the hours for this month in order to recover from the financial outputs. Also, in preparation for a great HOME Xmas!

Come to think of it. It has been years that I have not done my favourite Xmas shopping! Probably get myself a pretty dress or dresses? A gift for self? The joy of giving! Nothing big, they always say, thoughts that count! Remember those younger days, we used to make cards, mugs and little gifts for love ones! Now with busy schedule, most of us spend instead. Hmmmm.... what will I be doing this year?

I am already very excited to be going back for a home Xmas! With mummy, friends and special ones! Next, I guess I have to come up with a list of people I want to send my greetings to! WOW... not easy now that everyone is so not in action. =( Ah well.... life isn't it?

What's for Xmas then? Parties parties and more parties? Drinking till no tomorrow? Xmas house parties? Santa papa and Xmas trees with prezzies to discover? Home may not have the best Xmas spirit compared to European countries. However, it's the people that make my festive season count! Not where but who I have! I am really looking forward to time passing fast for now and gets by slower when I am back in the arms of my friends!

Dear Santa, I have been a good girl, please send joy, peace and love to all who mean to me! If you have spare time, come visit me and let's have Chivas on the rocks!

Just because there's...

Just because there's...

The silence of those words from the heart,
The leap of actions out of concern.
The warmth to cover winter's chills,
The fullness to fill the emptiness.

The sparks of flame,
The fires from within.
The tinkering of connection,
The magic of passion.

The worries enabled to be unladen.
The tears allowed to flow.
The fears guided to be unfolded.
The dailies shared.

The silliest things said and done.
The most fearful fears felt protected.
The most beautiful things shared.
The loneliest leaned upon.

The listened.
The understood.
The cared for.
The felt for.

The everything, every time.

Just because there's...

Friendship

Friendship is the most wonderous,

If only you allow the right people in your life.

Those who stay with you,

regardless of distance and time.

Through your ups and downs,

rights and wrongs.

Realising the walks in life,

Is never that alone,

With the friendship that keeps burning.

For true friends run with you,

No matter what.

Make the memories,

Behold them.

Hold them close to hearts,

Before time melts.

With connection,

Feel the pining,

Before the missing.

With understanding,

Read the mind,

Before the words.

With trust,

Love the loving,

Before the living.

With truth,

Make the unknowns known,

Before the discovery.

With feeling,

Take the giving,

Before the holding.

With love,
Make the nowness,
Before the cherishing.

Thank you friends!

For those who spent those great times,
Be it in moments of catching up over coffee,
or the hard core drinking sessions and crazy parties.
Thank you.
For those who still care and shower me with the love,
Thank you.
I miss all of you.
That sort of warmth that I miss having being out here.
Those little conversations that can be of hearts to hearts.
Those times of just being together bring me back to reality.
Nothing fake, pretentious nor too tiring.
Thank you for allowing me to be just me.
For now, once again, the thousand miles away.
Hearts to hearts shall be.

Experiences

Experiences, what does this word mean to you?

As you strive to understand the ever changing environment,
Why not pause and reflect on the things that were dear to you so far?
Probably you are still living with the wounds,
Have they not brought you to a different heights in life?
Do not despair, as the saying goes,
No pain, no gain.

We may be too focus on the daily walks,
That we have forgotten the wealth in experiences.
The steps that we are taking now,
Are they not affected by the past experiences?
The decisions we make now,
Are they not somehow based on the experiences?
The dares and fears we face now,
Are they not the sprouts of the experiences?
We keep learning from experiences,
Be it good or bad, the richness of them,
is the lessons gained.

The weather changes without warning at times,
Does that matter if we are always ready to embrace?
The sun shines and goes,
Moon appears and hides,
Clouds form and pass,
Rain pours and stops.
Temperature rises and drops.
What do you see in each of the weather?
How do you make best use of the weather at that moment?
Not catching moments of those times,
Will you not regret?
For the same weather will never repeat.
The strength of the sun, the brightness of the moon,
the shapes of the clouds, the amount of rain and the temperature,
they are different and unique everyday if you think about it.
Each day brings a different feel.
Each day brings new experiences.
What is it today that makes yesterday and tomorrow different?

Experiences, welcome or avoid them?

Silent Weekend

Another weekend is about to end. Been home resting that back of mine. Was good in a way to recover that energy, much needed. Not many activities on the siren this weekend as everyone is away. Silent as it can be. Some silly friends into the craze of Warbook on Facebook, which I can never understand or rather am not too keen to read up on it. The craze that is going on brought little joy and excitement to these friends.

Days like these make me miss the bursting weekend back home. Even if alone, I can still immerse in the bubbly streets and find somewhere comfortable to relax. Here? It is just so different. I will not dress up and head out for a walk or coffee. Why? Just to avoid getting frustrated with waiting for transport, the one and only, cabs. On top of it the inconsiderate loud or strange people who tends to disturb or interrupt time alone. Sighs. Days like these kill me.

Thoughts struggled in and out too. Cannot help it, Miss Bibi thinks alot when she is too free. These thoughts get me on my nerves. Giving it up is something not easy to do. Holding on to it brings chapters of the ugly knowns and fearful unknowns. Sitting down here, been listening to songs of the shared. Picking up thoughts and letting go of them. What is the final decision?
I wish there is someone to have a heart to heart chat though. Then again, will anyone really understand? Will anyone be able to listen and not give judgements? Feeling the emotional part of me overpowering now. I just wish time pass on quickly for me to be surrounded with TLC. I miss my friends back home dearly. Though I know some of you may be reading this and feeling worried. Don't be, Bibi has been through that much to be able to handle things alone now. I know I am never alone, because you guys are out there. Just that sometimes physical presence or even a voice I am familiar with soothes the pricks. I MISS ALL OF YOU!!!

There's a voice telling me to do it right. I guess I have to. This turmoil has to be freed. I don't want to face another silent weekend. The cycle will not end if I keep running away from the fact. Facing and dealing with it needs to take place. Do it right.

Guess the rest of the silent weekend will be with Internet till I feel tired enough to go sleep....

Traffic Lights

Traffic lights, ever had a tough decision as you zoom across these lamps?
The on-the-spot decisions made your day better or worse?
Red, Amber or Green?

There's a understood stretch of silence.
With those changing lights blinking there.
Listening to the sound of hearts,
the known facts are presented.
The race started without knowledge.
Recognising it was a choice,
facing the silence now is of such leech.
Reality in the race with wannabe.
A marathon runner compared to a sprinter.
The familiar compared to a complete stranger.
There is a world of difference.
That much to spill out,
only when not related.
The relations of the variables,
is something to crack brains and hearts upon.
Just like solving a challenging equation.

Simplicity often dissolves with real living.
Real living infuse a palette.
A palette involves choices to splash the colours.
The colours that paint the many pictures.
The many pictures of thousand words.
The thousand words to be represented in many ways.
The many ways of how an individual art is expressed.
The expressed is always unique.
The unique is often appreciated by some and not all.

When looking at a piece of art,
It's red, amber or green.
Red - Stop and take a look.
Amber - Pause and think of what message it drives at.
Green - Move on to others.
The previous pieces either linger in your mind,
or others after that create more impact.
To choose what one wants,
factors are considered.
From the use of the painting, location,
the message to carry across and etc.

Sometimes people buy a piece of art and after hanging it up,
they realise it is not as suitable.
Then the choice is, to replace it or change the setting of the environment.
Again, red, amber or green.
Red - Painting out of place! Need replacement!
Amber - Probably can make do with it. Change painting or environment?
Green - Fits perfectly!

Is it then more healthy to have traffic lights in areas of life?
On roads and in races, they act as a safety measure.
Still accidents do happen when judgements made at that point in time is incorrect.
In life, they can act on different aspects and roles.
What then do traffic lights in your life do to you?
Which of the three brings you more fear?
Red, Amber or Green?

What's on?

Was in Hong Kong for 24 hours. Needless to say it was food and shopping attacks more than anything. A few of us had the Wonton soup, others rice items. For desserts, mango dessert shop! Everything involved mangoes in them. Overall, a great dinner aka supper to catch up with. Went on the sleepless streets to take a digestive walk and then to a pub for a drink. Was pretty tired then. However, having a girlfriend as roomie often ended up yaking away isn't? We shared our little secrets, had our share of good laughters and then fell to sleep at 6a.m!!!
We woke up at 1030a.m. and went to town for shopping. I was fairly disappointed in search of clothes. WHY? Well, it's autumn/winter collection. I don't really need much of those. Therefore, was pretty empty handed after a whole day! Went into a supermarket though to get frozen dim sum! Last but not least, got glutinous rice balls and egg tarts for friends.

Imagine my 4 hours of sleep lasted me another 24 hours of non stop physical activities. I crashed the next day. Also suffering from backache or back injury, yet to find out. Getting old, I can feel it!

Today did not start very well. A solution will never be able to replace the original. Wonder what it is going to be. No matter, just hope happiness be with them actually... Though I hope for that kind of happiness to stay and grow...

A Chapter...

A chapter of you,
Will chapters keep going?

Missing you is just like listening to sad sentimental songs,
That leads emotions on.
Even when soaked in a crowd or with great company,
Time seems long and it feels that lonely.
Thinking of you when alone brings both smiles and frowns.
Looking out of the window,
The view does not replace that image that lasts.
Hoping as always - be by my side.
That loneliness is something difficult to shake off.
With coffee and cigarettes, moments shared flood in.
The momentum of everyday goes into a relation,
With the times and things shared,
In no matter of big or small.
The "Sa Rang Hae Yo" you mentioned,
Heart just beats in the same way yours does.
The frequency that matched often,
Wonders of it just keeps going.
The thoughts and every tiny piece of everything shared,
Moments of them treasured.
The songs that are applicable and totally describe,
Keeps appearing without the search.
You brought back the simplicity and basics.
Simple love, basics of love.
The discovery of what was not and what is.
The going just makes the path less lonely.

You are in this chapter...

A chapter that is of surprise.
A chapter that is of real.
A chapter that is of two hearts.
A chapter that is of a thousand miles away.
A chapter that is of a blur... it is complicated.

A chapter that is a treasure, every moment of it.

Romance in the air!

Venice/Venezia

Ciao! My recent visit to Venice, a city in northern Italy, excite me to really do a tour! It has always been one of the destinations I heart upon. However, luck was not on my side. It rained on the day I arrived, yes, of all days in October, it has to rain on me! Nevertheless, it did not stop me from taking walks and photos!

The typical setting, buildings, windows, churches, canals, gondolas, bridges, yummy pizza and pasta, friendly people and mesmerising masks!

These masks, I am so in love with them. Yes they are expensive, especially those elaborated and detailed ones! Due to the rush, I was not able to make up my mind which ones to buy, till next time I will make my attacks!




Master pieces from one shop to the other, they just get better!

A gang of us, Miss Korea, Japan, Singapore, Mr UAE, Brisbane, Sydney and Argentina were merry in the rain and cold. We attacked the churches, little eating huts, restaurants, shops, to small canals and then to the Grand canal, Rialto Bridge/Ponte di Rialto, St Mark's Basilica/Basilica di San Marco a Venezia, and St Mark's Square/Piazza San Marco.

It was too cold and the rain got heavier along the way. The final three survivors, Miss Seriously Funny Singapore, Mr Used-to-be-in Singapore Sydney and Miss Bibi Singapore! We went for our pasta and wine before heading back by the canal! Awesome trip! Thanks to all!

To Mr SinSydney/Mr Garrie Don, thanks for the memories of Singapore and it's local food plus the wonderful trip, beer and wine in Venice! We did it!

The happy rain-on-me Bibi in Venice and to Venice again!

That romance in the air, why was I not with someone special to spend time there! Ah......!

October ends, November's here!

First of all, let me tick off the checklist created for October.

1. Vitamins intake daily. 2. 3 Litres of water daily (excluding alcohol). 4. Avoid coffee when sleepy.8. A weekend visit to SIN for friends and party (swaps of duties!!!).---> to be in action plan again...ooops!

3. Cook a meal for friends (chicken curry requested).
5. Party after Ramadan!
6. Save for mummy's trip (means no shopping).
7. Delete items from lappie to free memory space.
9. Snapshots of Venice.
10. Checked this list by end October.

tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick......DONE!!!!

Not bad at all.. 60% accomplished! Heee.... the rest of the 40% oops...either cannot help it or done in bits and pieces!

November is here finally! My cells that are leaning towards Christmas... growing!!! The claws to my friends and love ones wide, yearning to reach them!!!

November Rain - G n R, all time favez!

I just cannot wait to be in the air and surroundings that I am familiar with!

Smashed...

Near to six hours to go before the preparation again. However, mood and physical conditions are smashed totally.

Wonder what's wrong with my sleep again. Must be the anxiety of trying to get my duties swapped. On top of it, the dizzy stars visited a couple of times today. The body aches seem to be signs of "ENOUGH"!!! Am I too stress over nothing? Not eating and resting well enough?

Frustrations!!!

Listening to songs did not soothe mood. Tried all genres, in the end, tears filled the emptiness of a pretty lost world. Chin up!!!

Just hope to doze off at least to comfort self. It's Bibi and Elmo world... wonder what the conversations will be like. A shoulder to cry on... Smashed... mentally, physically and emotionally. AHhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHHH.... go away!!! Hate this feeling right now!!!!!!!!!

Spending my time

I did what I set out to do... from cleaning my bathroom and bedroom to changing of my bed sheet. Feels good nice and fresh to sleep in... then again, my sleeping pattern sucks.

Been quite unlucky with my duties. Wanting to get home is such a task. Sometimes I just feel like giving up! Just hoping some kind soul will take on my duties.

Just back from watching Liverpool VS Arsenal. Not a fan of both, so went to the sports bar just to spend my time alone away, an excuse to drink after a week! Friends talked about Halloween and what to wear etc. Come to think of it, a long time since I dressed for that. Not really into it though. Can I be normal to be abnormal on that day?

A sudden attack too once again from that same old friend... Sometimes I wish I can really read what's on his mind and heart. It has been years these nonsenses dragged. I wonder if he is serious or not many times. However, acknowledging it and let it pass is still the key to minus yet another troubled mind.

Things are getting complicated on the other hand for me. Don't know if I am handling it correctly or simply very wrong. Pretty lost and confused. If only things were that simple... then happiness will not have to be searched for.

As long as that someone is happy, I guess I will be. Then again, what can I do? This much to say, that much to mention but only the limited can surface. Feeling the weight as days go by. Asking myself to be practical, rational and not emotional.

For now, all I want is time back home. Hoping that things can fall into place for me to be just home sweet home. I miss spending my time at where I belong....

Here's to all, have a great start for a new week, welcoming November, I can hear the jingle bells!!!!!!!!!

The Unexpected

The unexpected.

It comes with growth.

The unexpected.

It comes with struggles.

The unexpected.

It comes with uncertainties.

Conversations started on a casual note. With an unexpected click in the air.

They grew with sharing fair. From casual to personal note.

They vary from subjects and depths away. From the dailies to the past to the future.

From silly smiles to laughters that mature. Anything under the sky of miles away.

They progressed to a level. On a mutual basis.

Then it hits right on the beats of oasis. Personalised now at a level.

Claws surround the objects.

Clouds envelope the objects.

Cruelty cloud the objects.

Comfort between the objects.

Far it may be. Never it seem to be. Moments shall be. As memories make be.Whatever shall be, will be.

As much as that needs to be done and told.
All it can behold stretches more than imagination.

How long can the beholding be, that's the fear on hold.

The control of growth or not, yet to be in decision.

The constant heartbeats, like those when on a ride.

What more can be that real, it is tough to hide.

The aches that come along, without realisation.

The facts that are present, with recognition.

The little ins and outs, injected life in the objects.

On a unique basis of shared subjects, open yet in the dark hideouts.

The world that huge to be discovered, yet beheld within.

The shared melts in, a special blend that is tough to be denied and rejected.

The unexpected.

The growth of objects, probably meant to be.

The unexpected.

The confessions of secrets, probably meant to be kept.

The unexpected.

The sharing of lives, probably meant to be in that unique way.

What is Going On?

What is going on?

Laughing away at a party scene as friends got high and were in actions.

Drinking one after the other as the hours went on and music rolls.

Dancing the last hour off to celebrate the ending of a good and fun night.

Talking till the wee hours of the morning as to catch up and spend time away.

Nothing seems to take over what's on the mind even if a million things were in progress.

Mind ran through miles as heart beats.

Sleep seeped in as tiredness calls.

Thoughts awakened as eyes open.

Wait awaited as hours pass.

Decisions popped as senses sway.

What is going on?

Happy Birthday, Mummy!

It's this time of the year again... my beloved mummy's birthday. For the past two years including this, I have not been able to spend her birthday with her. Just made a long distance call to her to wish her happiness from the bottom of my heart. Chatted near to an hour to catch up as well. All I can feel now is that gripping in my heart and the uncontrollable tears. I do miss her in many ways. Memories flew to where my journey began with her. Those were not my best memories but I am glad we both made it this far to be this close now. To mummy, you are the best and yes, I do mean it when I say, "I LOVE YOU", every single time. In fact, I can never express that amount of love I have for you. You are the best mum to me in the world!

She who lost her sanity, did not know what is insanity.

She who cried daily, did not want a semi family.

She who fought the pain, not knowing if she will gain.

She who went through it, did not want a bottom pit.

She who saw us grow, did not want us low.

She who loves us in silence, is probably still lack of confidence.

She who understands us, discovers who we are without fuss.

She who is she today, a wonderful, best gift to me everyday.

Have you paused and think, how great your mum is? Every mum is special to their own.
To Ying Ying, who is struggling to be a mummy, you are never a lousy one. Never too lousy for that little life that you are beholding now. You are already the best mummy in the world!

Review...

Just back from yet another Manchester trip. Yes, yes, wow wee, Manchester Airport... did the usual, online session. Was a rather memorable session though, with pricks at heart but a sort of warmth that envelopes within. Sobz....

Reviewed the checklist for October, checked only two. Oops, am left with 16 days to make the rest happen. Haha... at least cooked a meal for friends and cleared some stuff from my lappie.

Included three Music Videos from You tube. Beyond - "Love". Bibi with Chinese songs? Oh no! Beyond is the only cheena band I listen to during school days. The song, "Love", being my favourite from the band, hit me hard with the lyrics recently. The other two videos, "I Wanna Grow Old with You", has really meaningful applicable lyrics too... added the original MV and the other cartoonish version. Do hope you guys enjoy a little of them.

Slept after the trip, really knock out. Guess I really did "walked" to and from Manchester! Now on Heineken and chilling with new found music, from The Real HypnotiX, evil evil! Oh is it Sunday? Ah.... another week gone... wake me up when October is over! I am so looking forward to my leave in November! Singapore, friends and party, here I am, on the way soon!

Beyond-Love

I Wanna Grow Old With You Music Video

westlife; I wanna grow old with you

How many times have you fallen in love?

"How many times have you fallen in love?"

I was thrown with this question and it got me thinking. What went through was a search of that long lost feeling. Putting myself to those times, not many, when that mesmerising feeling dwell from within and became more than words can describe. What went through my mind too was the past. Hmmm... wondered if they really loved me. I heart those who did love me. Some tried to, some, just don't and never.
As I heard and seen the things guy friends do for their girlfriends, hey you lucky girls! Don't ask me, the pain left behind was that over bearing that happy memories are tough to sort out. Nevertheless, that feeling of being in love is something that I have been missing. Probably something I left there and then, it died and was never alive again. The next question was, then why was I with those after that? What was it when it was not love? Companionship? Trying to be with one? Hoping that by trying it will turn out to be something that last? Funny, how a simple question led to many others. Oh, falling in love... will it ever happen to me again?

Looking for love, there's no need to as it comes most unexpectedly.

Omitting love, it sometimes cannot be help as it comes sincerely.

Verifying love, there's no need to as it speaks truthfully.

Explaining love, it sometimes cannot be define as it belongs individually.

For those of you who are in love and walking the path with that someone you love, keep that love growing.

For those who are in love with someone without their knowledge, don't despair but keep loving dare!

For those who are in love with the wrong person, it's not your fault, one day, you will be love by someone who deserve it better.

For those who think you are out of love and feeling lost, brace, what is meant to be will be.

For all in, out or of no love... love is still in the air, somewhere, somehow it will hit you!!!

Helplessly Sleepless

It's the early morning and I again. Bibi sleepless again.. ha, what's new?!? Yesterday was a day of traffic, supermarket spree and cooking!

Caught near to 2 hrs of sleep before heading out, almost dragging. I had to as I promised to cook and needed to top up the necessities at home. It could easily be a job done in Singapore within an hour. I took more than 4hours to complete a trip for groceries and toiletries! This included waiting for a cab (no other choices), getting there with traffic, on the job shopping, in a cab queue for an hour and back home stuck on roads! Oh ya, and I bumped into that him again at the lobby... total strangers now. Childish but I did not start it but give up trying to be friends when one is of such mentality!

By the time I got home, dinner preparations rolled. Just in time for the friends I invited (or should I say they happily volunteered?). Dinner was Bibi's chicken curry with rice and french baguette. Rice was not for me!!!

Photos taken by Jacky Thia. Gerald caught in action!!!

Along came Heineken beer! Yum! Dessert was ice cream along with the chattery chattery session! Chatted over issues on job, food, places to visit, investments, China ladies, navy boys, bumping into old mates, outings and etc. Thanks, Gerald, Kaew, Jacky and Terry, for the evening and helping to wash the dishes, phew!

I have not really slept in days. I just don't know what's going on with my bio clock! Tick tock, on my zzz clock! Probably got to learn to free my mind from those clogs!

SMILES

Sincerity at heart

Motion of throbs

Interaction with truth

Love by surprise

Echos of images

Songs of thoughts

Smiles... when were the last because you really want to?

Smiles... when were the last because someone made your day?

Smiles... when were the last because your heart smiled?

Smiles... when were the last because you were missing someone?

Smiles... when were the last because you felt the same?

Smiles... when were the last because you thought it was silly?

Smiles... when were the last because you know someone is watching over you?

Smiles... when were the last because we really were high and cannot help but smile?

Smiles... when were the last because of the many reasons we could name?

Have you been smiling? Smiles with and from your heart? Here's to all, keep smiling, even if it may just be a dream...

Another day of...

Working again at weird hours of the morning... was in a state of battle with decision. To go or not to go. Then again, why waste time sitting around in a cold lonely place when I can at least gain warmth and feel live somewhere else? Decided to take the chance. Let that day decide if I will get to where I belong for some TLC!

Had my favourite avocado juice today, did not expect someone to like it as well. Ha... Ar well.. if you have not tried avocado juice, grab one! It is nutritious and yummy!

Dragging myself to get prepared as I listen to Diana Krall's...

Wishing those back home had a good Friday party night and hell of a weekend!

Another day of... turning!